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This page contains information of the following SOLDIER member.
This is an official document generated under the provision of the Personnel Identity Act, Chapter 169 of the 3120 Edition and the
Institutional Secrets Act, Chapter 699 of the 3120 Edition.
All unauthorised use, retention, destruction, alteration or transfer of information are penal offences.
Name : Tan SiKai
Rank : SOLDIER 2nd Class
Birthdate : 10 April 1989
Birthplace: Singapore
Ethnicity : Chinese
Religion : Christianity
Gender : Male
Height : 167
Weight : 56
Values:
-Commitment
-Trust
-Truth
-Reason
Personality:
ISFJ (Jung Typology Test) - I-22%, S-1%, F-25%, J-33%
Explanation:
* slightly expressed introvert
* slightly expressed sensing personality
* moderately expressed feeling personality
* moderately expressed judging personality
Traits:
* Large, rich inner store of information which they gather about people
* Memory for details which are important to them
* In-tune with surroundings - sense of space and function
* Can be depended on to follow things through to completion
* Will work long and hard to see that jobs get done
* Stable, practical, down-to-earth - Dislike working with theory and abstract thought unnecessarily
* Dislike doing things which don't make sense to them
* Value security, tradition, and peaceful living
* Service-oriented: focused on what people need and want
* Kind and considerate
* Likely to put others' needs above their own
* Learn best with hands-on training
* Enjoy creating structure and order
* Take their responsibilities seriously
* Extremely uncomfortable with conflict and confrontation
Career-defining traits:
1) extremely interested and in-tune with how other people are feeling
2) enjoy creating structure and order, and are extremely good at it.
Ideally, the ISFJ will choose a career in which they can use their exceptional people-observation skills to determine what people
want or need, and then use their excellent organizational abilities to create a structured plan or environment for achieving what
people want.
Relationships:
+Committed
+Difficulty in leaving a relationship which is bad, or accepting that it's over
+Selfless
+Intimacy as a tangible way of strengthening their relationship bonds
+Warm
+Difficulty with conflict situations
+Dependable and affectionate lovers
Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, the ISFJ's natural partner is the ESTP, or the ESFP. ISFJ's dominant function of Introverted Sensing is best matched with a partner whose dominant function is Extraverted Sensing.
More at:
ISFJ Profile or
Protrait of
an ISFJ
"To be a hero you got to have dreams... and honor" - Angeal
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~Me, My Future, My Past~
Monday, 14 May 2007
Wa sick of the Windows Explorer today. Keep giving me problems. Cannot upload photos, okay I accept it. Now it even stopped responding at times while I was blogging and I had to rewrite everything. Now even my mom and dad were angry with me for staying up late. Normally I dun want to say this, but really I am very pissed off with them, especially my dad. Imagine a person looking over you doing your own private stuff for a long time, just observing and nothing else. The feeling of being watched is just too much to bear. In the past I might have just be at peace with it, but now I guessed its just too much. I think they too do not want to feel the same way. As much as I wanted to think in their train of thoughts, that its getting late and I have to sleep, I can't help thinking they were thinking from the wrong context. I did take an afternoon nap, and if I were to sleep now, I would be just rolling on my bed. What's the point of doing that? It is then more productive if I were to do something else. Idiotic behaviour is the best way I can describle them. In the future I may think like them, and my son may feel the same way too. But that feeling of guilt should play no part in forming the truth, that they are over-bearing.
So we were on the topic of the new revelation of myself on friday. I was having my dinner with Sin Man and Min Kuan accompanying me. Sin Man's friend joined us awhile later.
This friend of Sin Man is just like any other friend of her, very sociable and easily tickled. But he has a certain "flavour" in him. We were on a topic on my ambition and he paused suddenly, like the time has stopped in him. Then he looked at me straight in the face saying, "You are made for more than your ambition." I was from then on very sensitive to his behaviour, especially his "pause" here and there, followed by some words that were very specific to me. Its very spooky.
(just had an arguement with my mom. She keeps muttering and criticising about my behaviour, about the way the house is. I just spilled my solution of vinegar, and did what I can in clearing up the mess, and she just go on rambling about my inability to keep the place clean, about my inability to remove the smell of vinegar. I rebuked at her, which may be wrong on my part, but I hoped to draw her attention to the fact that what's so good about pure words alone? Actions speak louder than words. I can't help but think that if she was less criticising and more accepting, just clear up the floor without any display of disgust, I would not be some critical of her and my dad.)
Anyway I bought home with me 2 Words that day, "Blessed are those poor in the spirit, for theirs the Kingdom of God", and "Seek first the Kingdom of God, and all else will be added to you". He also prophesied that I can be a preacher. Then I discovered that to be one, I have to be a cell leader. Not unexpected, but that was a route I'm not so willing to go. My ambition is to be a top Material Scientist or Physicist, which will be time-consuming. I guess this is where I'll need Father to bring me through, to top both in the marketplace as well as in christian lifestyle.
When I got back home, I start to evaluate my action on "one and only one commitment". As I was presenting my arguement to them earlier, I was totally convince of my logic. One was because of innate feeling, while the other is due to producivity factor. Then Sin Man's friend just rebuked with the revelation that I was running away from something, trying to hide something. I was caught off-guard. Fear of one's behaviour leading to a creating of a policy against it. (sound so Ah Gong-like).
My evaluation eventually lead to 10 fears (omg!) arising from one policy alone. And these fears were so innate in me that they were unconscious. Fear of, not in order of merit, 1)losing, 2)lack of perfection, 3)sexual immorality, 4)disorder, 5)emotional mayhem, 6)deviating from Christ, 7)lack of civic-mindedness, 8)lack of time, 9)lack of motivation, 10)and my results.
I fear losing her to others. She was always on demand, while I was just a part of this group of suitors. When I was young I like this girl in my class. Even young, she has quite a few suitors, and one was even my best friend. Fear of losing friendship kept me from revealing anything, even with rumours sprouting. Others had sacrificed quite alot for her, and I don't think I can ever reach those standards. We just stayed as best friends. When we were older, being in different schools, we hardly met. There was this once when she mentioned of a guy in her class, which never occurred in our conversation before. She had even taken a photo with him, at the time where she would reject my request for one. The guy was taller than me, and I was just the same height as her. That guy also bought her the thing she had been eyeing on for a long time. The worst of all was that she asked me of the future between them. It was so heart-breaking. as I tried not to bring in any emotions while helping her to evaluate, its just too difficult for me. I said that they can't be together, but this conclusion was just too bias for me. It was so bias that out of all her friends, I was the only one saying that they cannot be together.
I also fear that my partner-would-be lack perfection. I want my partner to be good both outwardly and inwardly. Every time I meet others I would first judge them by their appearance, whether they are fat or thin or just proportionate, whether they are too fashionable for me or too skimpy. As I slowly get to know them, I would look into whether they have the right attitude to life, and whether I can change their attitude to be more positive. I do not want my partner to be anything less, lest they do not appeal after some time and our relationship will fail.
(for those who do not want to know the worst of me, skip this point)
I fear of being sexually immoral. This is to me the worst temptation ever. Unknown to many, I am fallen greatly because of this aspect, which I termed the sin of the body. I was first exposed to sexual immorality when I was in primary 3 under the care of a guardian. The son of the guardian thought me masturbation, and perhaps oral sex, though I was young and do not know at that time. At primary 5 I chanced upon a pornographic CD, knowing it was wrong to watch, but still I did whenever no one was at home, until the CD was misplaced. At seconday 1, a friend of mine showed me a pornographic website. From then on I surfed it frequently until I can quickly conjour out possible location of websites with a simple thought. I am still struggling to control such immorality. (The worst part will not be blogged, but I am willing to say face-to-face if necessary. To date only Niang and Xiu Yi and perhaps those in TKD alumni know)
All of us I guess have this fear, the fear of disorder, the fear of uncertainty. We do not know how will things turn out, and do not want to be caught unprepared. By having a plan, we hope to be able to react as fast as possible to the unexpected, we hope to make sense of what is happening.
In the past I used to peg my emotions to my relations with people I considered important to me. The girl I like when I was young was one of them. Whenever I saw her getting close to others I'll have this wretched feeling, of jealously. I can't believe how possessive I can be, though I tried not to show it outwardly. Then there is Xiu Yi, whom I considered last year as important mainly because she was the one that took the effort to talk to me. If she talk to others instead of me, I will easily sink into depression mood, which I think was what happened in the morning of the grading in January. I don't feel motivated to perform, and halfway through my grading I forgot my pattern, and so I failed to get a double promotion. Not all close to me are females of course. While I was in sec 2 I had a group of close guys friend. One day for some reasons which I forgot, I was left alone. In my lonely walk home, I saw the grasses by the side, swaying joyfully in the wind. I am just too easily knocked down.
Perhaps I fear deviating from Christ too. I am not confident of my walk with Christ. Partly this was due to my sinful nature, and my pride, that I cannot fulfil the 1st Beattitude, that I cannot be poor in the spirit. She as seen by me have a more established relationship with the Lord. But though this may be a fear, it may not be a strong case.
To me, she is a role model. She is a member of a community outreach club in her school. She is always willing to serve the needs of others, compared to me, someone who wishes to help but always dependent on the friends around me. If none of my friends wants to help out, I would most likely just forgo this experience. I am still trying to break free from the dependency on others, and is currently searching for a ministry in my church to serve. Thinking of helping out in the Ministry for Terminally Ill, so that I can learn to cherish my life and thank God more for this life that I have.
Aiya the last 3 is a common problem so dont need to expand liao. Cant believe I took 1wk to write this.. Sian..
20may 07 @ 10.16pm
posted at : 23:06
to do list
rock climbing regularly
play paintball
go ice-skate
go roller-blade
go cycle
swimming!
hit the beach
and many more...
To Remember
07.01 Guo Hao's bday
01.02 Kenneth's bday
05.04 KaiYu's bday
15.04 Sin Man's bday
16.04 Nuranati's bday
02.05 Jimmy's bday
28.05 yaNN's bday
01.06 Xiu Wen's bday
15.06 Jian Wei's bday
07.07 Dorcas' bday
07.08 XiuXuan's bday
07.08 Xiuyi's bday
09.08 Singapore's bday
30.08 Tze Chong's bday
10.09 MaioSia's bday
07.11 ShiHUa's bdday
08.11 yIhUAn's bday
13.11 Cherie's bday
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March 2007
